Were you too controlling in your relationship?  Did he/she kick you out because you smothered them, were too bossy and demanding?  Did you have to know where they were at all times and try to make them spend their free time with you?  Were you too much in control?  You can learn more about making up with your ex boyfriend here.

Doing these kinds of things should cause a healthy person like your ex to hit the eject button on your relationship.  After a short while controlling behaviors smother your mate and they lose their interest in being with you quickly.

Now you want to get your ex back in your life hopefully without the whole controlling thing.   What, if anything, can you do to get them back?

The answer is that it depends on how controlling you were in your relationship with your ex.  You may have caused too much hurt and rejection from your ex.  You may even need some relationship coaching before you get back into a love situation with anyone.  Love and power over another are not the same thing, and mixing them up can kill the intimacy in a relationship.

You may, however, get your ex back if you didn’t cause irreparable harm.  And that begins with seeing that power over and need and dominance are not the same as love and intimacy.  If you see that controlling behaviors like keeping them from friends and making them account for their time away from you is not healthy, that is a good beginning.

The question is, did you learn something from the experience of being dumped by your mate.  If so, that is something that can actually help you get your ex back.  You can get a complete system for Get Ex Back here.

The next step is to have a special 20 minute or so conversation with your mate.  In this conversation you have to accomplish several things.  Acknowledge the damage you caused them, let them vent to you about how you hurt them, and then convince them that you truly have learned from your mistakes and won’t repeat the behavior.  It isn’t easy, but if you can accomplish those things you can make room for your ex to begin considering you in a better light.  We all like to feel we have helped people to learn things in life.

There is much greater detail to these steps than we have room for here.  But learning from your mistakes and convincing them of some of what you’ve learned can go a long way towards getting your ex back, or at least create some room for them to consider trying a date or two with you again.  Go here for a free course on How To Get Relationship Advice.