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Making Up With Your Exgirlfriend
Wednesday, July 29th, 2009 • admin

getting ex girlfriend back

They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder.  If your girlfriend is now your ex, you probably understand the truth of that statement.  If you could only get a second chance, you’d show her how much you love her.  You can learn more about getting your love back here.

How do you go about getting your ex girlfriend back?  It depends on why you broke up.  Understand that and you’ll know which approach to use.

The first reason for breaking up is that you wronged your ex.  You either cheated on her or you were too controlling or too jealous or too demanding and she dumped you.  At some point it got to be too much and she told you to take a hike.

Another main reason relationships end is that she isn’t that into you anymore.  She was into you at first, but then maybe she didn’t feel appreciated or got bored or felt that you weren’t the guy she wanted to spend the future with.  “Relationship Drift” happened and she lost interest.

So if you understand why she left you, then you’ll know which approach to use to get her back.  Let’s say you cheated on your ex girlfriend.  You wronged her.  Then the approach to use is to make a Smart Apology.  This is a particular kind of apology that is emotionally powerful and can begin to repair the damage you caused by wronging her.  You can learn more about getting back together in 3 simple steps specifics here.

A smart apology has several steps to it.  But the thing is you don’t even say you’re sorry til the third or fourth step.  First, you fess up to what you did.  You don’t try to avoid blame, you take responsibility.  Then you let her vent, and get things off her chest.  You just listen and don’t try to argue.

If you can do those two things before you apologize, you are halfway home to restoring her trust and making her feel heard and understood.  Too many guys just keep saying they are sorry til they are blue in the face and it makes no difference.   A Smart Apology will impact your ex girlfriend emotionally.

Now, if the problem the relationship ended was because she isn’t that into you anymore, you need an entirely different approach, obviously.  You can find out more about that from a free course in the link below.  There is much more to getting your ex girlfriend back, but just this is a good way to begin.  Get your free course on getting your ex back here.

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Get Ex Girlfriend Back For Good
Friday, July 17th, 2009 • admin

 

So, you finally did her in, right? After all those romantic years of being together, going every Saturday night to treat her for a lovely and plush dinner, watching a movie together and basically doing everything just like any love birds would do, you have finally decided to call it quits. Well, talking about what every love birds do, even the “breaking up” part, you didn’t spare it, right? But why is it that when you’re alone, you feel that there is something missing? Why is it that there seems to be a sort of black hole right in the middle of your heart and it’s covered with what they call “pride”? Oh, so, you’re thinking about how to get your ex girlfriend back, aren’t you?

So, what have you got in mind? You let her go in a not-so-nice manner and now you’re thinking about hugging her in your arms again? Well, if you really are decided to do just that, there are many ways that you can learn how to get your ex back. For other people, they will just suddenly call her up one of these days and tell her how sorry he is for what he has done to her and now, he wants to make up. Well, that’s easier said than done. After what that person did to her, do you think she will just say “yes” instantly, even though, granting that she still loves that guy? No, it would also be difficult for her to say “yes” again to him. She will be thinking like: “Yes, I still love that guy but what if he breaks my heart again? What if I wanted to move on with other guys who won’t break my heart?”

You see, there are many things that you should consider if you want her back again and the first thing you need to do is to let go of your “pride”, humble yourself in front of her. And the only person that can help you is yourself and to help you out, you can find a book guide that can teach how to an ex girlfriend back or an ex boyfriend back…and this time, for good.

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Making Up With Ex After Infidelity
Monday, May 18th, 2009 • admin

Cheating is, of course, one of the biggest reasons that relationships break up.  When cheating has occurred, the other person believes “I can’t ever trust him or her again.”

That is a common refrain when cheating occurs.  Trust is essential to close, intimate, real love.  When it is broken, we feel like there is no hope for getting it back.  Even if we loved much about our mate, if they cheated on us, we don’t see how we could ever be happy again with them, how could we trust them after such a sense of betrayal.  You can learn more about getting your ex back after infidelity here.

For this reason trust is one of the largest problems in break ups.  Your ex is wondering if they can ever truly trust you not to cheat on them again.  Why get back together if there is just going to be more cheating?  So when break ups happen due to cheating, on of the big issue on your ex’s mind is

Can I ever feel that I can trust you after this?

I mean, if they rejected you because of some problem behavior, like cheating, or fighting, or not communicating with them, then they need to know BEFORE they let you come back that you wont keep doing the thing they left you about.

The emotion of broken trust/betrayal is one of the toughest feelings for an ex lover to get over.  We all believe that trust takes a long time to build.  So when it’s broken, we usually believe it is unfixable, correct?

You must understand the trust issue to see how you can get back together with your ex.  If you can’t deal with the feelings of betrayal and broken trust and the complete emotional distance that it causes, you won’t be able to get back together.  And, if you do somehow luck out and they give you another chance, it won’t last, because without trust there can’t be the feeling of closeness and intimacy we all really want.

So how can you deal with and repair trust issues?  This is a large subject, but one thing that is easy to see is that in most break ups, we all try to avoid blame.  So we tend to try to lay the blame elsewhere.  We say things like “I cheated because I drank too much!”  Or, “I cheated because you were cold and distant!”  The natural way we react when big issues like cheating come up is to try to avoid the blame. 

Give those excuses to your ex and shell think you’re a weak idiot.  She may take you back, but it wont last, there will be real distance, because those excuses don’t allow her to trust you.  What if you get drunk again?  What if she is cold to you a month from now?  What if a pretty skirt tempts you tomorrow when you’re walking down the street? So one of the first powerful things you can do is accept blame.  Take full responsibility.  Don’t offer weak or lame excuses.  You can learn a full system for resolving relationship conflict here.

Instead of weak excuses, you can say something like “I know I broke your trust in me, and I’m so sorry that I did this and made you feel so hurt…”

That is a powerful start to repairing the trust.  If you got cheated on hearing that can help you to begin to deal with the infidelity.  Its like when you have kids and they screw up and you catch them and they try to lie or blame someone else it makes you much angrier.  But if they own up to it you can forgive them much more easily.

There are many other steps that need to be followed before you can truly begin to repair the trust, but this is a very big initial step!  Go here for a free course on Get Relationship Advice.

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Get Your Ex Back If You’ve Been Too Controlling
Saturday, May 16th, 2009 • admin

getting your ex back

Were you too controlling in your relationship?  Did he/she kick you out because you smothered them, were too bossy and demanding?  Did you have to know where they were at all times and try to make them spend their free time with you?  Were you too much in control?  You can learn more about making up with your ex boyfriend here.

Doing these kinds of things should cause a healthy person like your ex to hit the eject button on your relationship.  After a short while controlling behaviors smother your mate and they lose their interest in being with you quickly.

Now you want to get your ex back in your life hopefully without the whole controlling thing.   What, if anything, can you do to get them back?

The answer is that it depends on how controlling you were in your relationship with your ex.  You may have caused too much hurt and rejection from your ex.  You may even need some relationship coaching before you get back into a love situation with anyone.  Love and power over another are not the same thing, and mixing them up can kill the intimacy in a relationship.

You may, however, get your ex back if you didn’t cause irreparable harm.  And that begins with seeing that power over and need and dominance are not the same as love and intimacy.  If you see that controlling behaviors like keeping them from friends and making them account for their time away from you is not healthy, that is a good beginning.

The question is, did you learn something from the experience of being dumped by your mate.  If so, that is something that can actually help you get your ex back.  You can get a complete system for Get Ex Back here.

The next step is to have a special 20 minute or so conversation with your mate.  In this conversation you have to accomplish several things.  Acknowledge the damage you caused them, let them vent to you about how you hurt them, and then convince them that you truly have learned from your mistakes and won’t repeat the behavior.  It isn’t easy, but if you can accomplish those things you can make room for your ex to begin considering you in a better light.  We all like to feel we have helped people to learn things in life.

There is much greater detail to these steps than we have room for here.  But learning from your mistakes and convincing them of some of what you’ve learned can go a long way towards getting your ex back, or at least create some room for them to consider trying a date or two with you again.  Go here for a free course on How To Get Relationship Advice.

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